I believe we all make choices every day about our commitment and dedication to relationships. And that goes for all relationships, whether they be romantic, family, or with friends. We can choose to have deep meaningful relationships, or more simple and less intimate ones. And the deeper our relationships go, the deeper our understanding of that person goes, and consequently we experience more harmony, satisfaction, love, and connection with that person. I believe God allows us to make this same decision about our relationship with Him. And I also believe the opposite is true. We can choose to have a simple and more surface relationship with God, or a deeper and more connected one. It’s part of our free will. It’s part of God’s experiment here on earth. It’s not about going to Heaven or Hell either. It’s about a deeper connection and understanding of our creator. Do we choose to really live, or do we choose to merely exist?
As I walk out the life of “7 Breaths”, I find myself creating sort of a “Tether System” with Him. The deeper my relationship with Him goes, the more I start to understand what this world is for, why we are here, and what the purpose of humanity truly is. I believe that much of our understanding of this world, and beyond, comes from our perspective. When we experience tragedy, we often get caught up in the details and we start to lose our perspective on life as a grand journey, and not just a moment in time. There are lessons in tragedy, and there is a beauty in suffering that we often fail to realize. Without suffering, we could not experience the full magnitude of joy. Often it is only through suffering that we become stronger and more connected. When I look back over my life I realize that the times I cherish most are generally the times when I was coming out of a tragedy or some sort of suffering.
In these moments of tragedy and desperation, it behooves us to take a step back and ask ourselves why this has happened. Maybe we will find an answer, and maybe not. There is also a beauty in realizing that we don’t have to know all of the answers, and to remember that God cares nothing of time, only of timing. Things happen for a reason, often beyond our realm of comprehension. And when we can find solace in the mysteries of life, and believe that there is purpose in everything, we may begin to glide. When our faith is what is should be, we can find peace in the unknown.
When I am in the midst of tragedy, or something I do not understand, no matter how trivial or how devastating, I stop myself and remember that this is only a moment in time, and there must be a purpose in it. What can I learn from this? Life is about a series of changing trajectories. We all have different experiences that change the trajectory of our lives, daily.
I have created sort of an imaginary “tether system” with God. Imagine there being a long elastic tether coming down from the Heavens, connected in some way to God, and all of His infinite wisdom and understanding. I imagine myself on such a tether, able to spring up above the earth for a new perspective at any moment it is needed. And as I experience tragedy, I am able to spring up on this tether, seek God’s council, and then channel whatever anger, frustration or fear I may be feeling into strategizing and gaining some sense of understanding and consequent plan of action. Then I come back down to earth and put it into action, and I try to do that within the span of “7 Breaths”.
This “Tether System” allows me to keep constantly connected to God, just as I have spoken of in “7 Breaths”. It allows me to keep a fresh perspective. I see each moment as a series of moments in the journey. Each moment of frustration, tragedy, loss, anger, bewilderment, and regret can be channeled into positive action as long as I am tethered to God constantly, in each moment. Nothing is chance. Things happen for a reason. God doesn’t create tragedy, but He often allows it to happen so he may bring us through it. That’s the beauty in suffering that I’m speaking of. It’s on the other side of suffering.
Using this “Tether System” is also a choice. It’s one I must be disciplined to make, in every moment, of every day, and I realize that at any moment, I could in fact lose my connection. So I am constantly putting forth an effort to keep it in tact. The tether is always there. I just have to choose to use it. And as I walk through this, it becomes easier and more natural. It becomes my first reaction, instead of only finding it in moments of desperation, long after the fact. This is the connection I am speaking of in “7 Breaths”.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
7 Breaths
In the Hagakure (The Book of the Samurai), there is a virtue that states:
“In the words of the ancients, one should make his decisions within the space of seven breaths. Lord Takandobu said, “If discrimination is long, it will spoil.” Lord Naoshige said, “When matters are done leisurely, seven out of ten will turn out badly. A warrior is a person who does things quickly.
When your mind is going hither and thither, discrimination will never be brought to a conclusion. With an intense, fresh and undelaying spirit, one will make his judgments within the space of seven breaths. It is a matter of being determined and having the spirit to break right through to the other side.”
One might read this and believe it to be reckless or irresponsible and perhaps ruling out the importance of council and necessity of prayer. However, you must first understand the nature of the Hagakure and the Way of the Samurai. This virtue of “7 Breaths” implies much more than just making quick decisions. This is not a result of egotism or negligence. It is in fact quite the opposite.
The nature of the Samurai is to be in a state of constant awareness and connection to their master; in tune. Consequently, the Samurai, meaning “servant”, are able to serve and understand others in the way we were created to do. This is not only true of the Samurai, it is true of each for each of us.
So this is where I’m at. I’m not trying to tell anyone else how to live their life; just thinking out loud. Nothing I’m saying here is new or even profound. It’s just my thoughts and where I’m at. I’m just now understanding this stuff in my own life. If you want to really understand how this stuff works, read the books I’m always talking about. Those are the people that truly understand. Below is a list of the things that have brought me to the 7 Breaths theory. I am now in tune with:
God – In a way where I am in constant prayer. My life is a prayer at all times. I am in constant communication with God throughout my day, constantly receiving His divine council. I have real conversations with God, not just a one way relationship where I ask for help in a time of need. I in fact have a true “relationship” with God, just as we are called to do. God is not just a higher being up in the heavens. He is the center of my life. He is my center. My life, and consequently those around me have changed immensely due to this level of relationship, awareness, and understanding of God. I am completely centered around Christ and my relationship is no longer based on those desperate moments when I need His help. God is truly my friend, as He so desires to be. This has greatly affected my life and my ability to serve others and make quick and educated decisions, generally within the space of 7 Breaths.
People – In a way where I noticed the nuances about life in every circumstance, not just when I am deliberately paying attention or asked to do so. I notice when people change their hair, have a new shirt, or when something is out of the norm. I notice all the people around me when I walk into a restaurant or office. I notice babies, and any surrounding danger that might harm them. I notice an elderly person that might need assistance. I notice someone that is in pain and I engage them. I ask real questions. Being aware is only half of the process. Engaging with others is essential, and it takes time and commitment. When I leave a room, I can easily describe who was there, what they were wearing and what they may have been feeling. I remember the way they made me feel, and the way I likely made them feel. I am conscious of that. People notice that I care enough to be aware and in tune with them. My relationships have definitely strengthened.
Being constantly in tune with people, all people, allows me to begin to truly understand them. This allows me to be in true relationship with them, which allows me to be more connected and to understand. I cannot be truly connected to a thing until I understand it. I can not understand a thing until I take the time to truly listen. I must listen twice as much as we speak. The more I listen, the more I learn and the better I understand. The more I understand, the more I gain wisdom. The more wisdom I have, the better I am able to serve and understand others; the happier life becomes, for me, and for those that experience me. This has greatly affected my life and my ability to serve others and make quick and educated decisions, generally within the space of 7 Breaths.
God created us to be in tune with nature and with things we have created in nature around us. The more I listen, the more in sync my life becomes. The more in sync my life becomes, the better I am able to understand how the world works, and how it doesn’t. This has greatly affected my life and my ability to serve others and make quick and educated decisions, generally within the space of 7 Breaths.
The World – In a way that I am constantly educating myself on world issues and on how to be a better person. I take the time to educate myself about the things I care about. I take the time to educate myself on the things that my loved ones care about. This is very important and greatly enhances and strengthen my relationships. I take time to study people, places and things that I encounter daily, or wish to. Then when I am asked a question, or faced with a decision, I can answer from an educated standpoint. If I say I care about something, I am prepared to back it up with facts and well thought-out philosophies. Anything less than this is foolish. One should only speak with authority on issues one is educated in. If I am not educated on many issues, I will fail to have the right to speak with authority on many issues, or to understand the way the world around us operates.
I constantly strive to make myself a better person, never being content with my current level of knowledge. I set goals for myself and map out a plan to achieve them. I am able to engage in serious in depth conversations about politics, social affairs, faith and personal interests. I am educated not just on my home country or immediate surroundings, but on the world as a whole. I have a world view, not a myopic one. I study different races, religions and social economics. I embrace equality in all circumstances on all levels. I am constantly listening to the world around me and educating myself in an effort to be a better human being. I aspire to exemplify the philosophy of “ubuntu” and understand the importance of interconnectedness. This has greatly affected my life and my ability to serve others and make quick and educated decisions, generally within the space of 7 Breaths.
Myself – In a way where I know my optimal physical, mental and spiritual self and how to maintain it. I know the precise amount of sleep in order to operate optimally. I know how much physical activity my body can endure for what amount of time. I am constantly learning more about my body, and listening to its needs. I am not abusing my body in any way, with substances, or even over exertion. I take care of my body as if it were a gift from God, which it is. I use my body as a vessel to carry out my purpose in life.
I view my mind, body and soul as one connected being, constantly striving to keep it healthy and at optimal condition. i work out and keep physically fit so I may be able to handle the physical challenges of every day life, which differs for everyone. I constantly feed my mind with positive material that helps me grow into a better human being. I surround myself with others that challenge me and hold me accountable. I take the time and effort to foster and nurture my relationship with God, knowing that if my spirit is weak, my faith is weak. And if my faith is weak, I have nothing. Everything starts to crumble from there. I am in tune with my body and I understand how to take care of it and use it for its purpose. I am disciplined. I am driven. I am a machine.
I practice “life balance”. I know I have to take time to rest, and to reflect, and to learn. I do not get caught up in “everyday life” because I look at the world from a world view, not just a minute to minute circumstance. I am not controlled by my circumstances. I am in control. I see problems in life as an “opportunity for a solution” not a stumbling block. I seize each moment as if it were my last, and I am at peace with God, myself, and those around me. This has greatly affected my life and my ability to serve others and make quick and educated decisions, generally within the space of 7 Breaths.
My mind, body and soul are all equally a part of who I am. Each has to be taken care of. Each has to be studied so that I might know how to best take care of them. If I am doing all of this, and if I am in tune with God, people, my surroundings, myself and the ways of the world, there is little that can hold me back from being the person God created me to be. And we were ALL created for greatness. When I am in tune, I have the ability to serve more effectively. I have the ability and drive to be passionate, as well as compassionate. I am prepared. I am aware. And ultimately, when I need to make a decision, of any kind, I am better equipped to do so, within a space of 7 breaths. This, I believe, is how I was designed to truly live. And this is the philosophy of “7 Breaths”.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Serve with Excellence
I recently returned to the
Monday, May 12, 2008
Missions Work That Works
I have spoken a few times in the past year to churches and individuals that asked how they could give or serve more effectively, or how they could improve the effectiveness of their missions department. So I’ve created a document here that relays some of my thoughts and ideas about more effective missions work.
So often I hear of churches sending groups of 5-15 missionaries to some foreign country for two weeks at a time and it makes me cringe. And on this end (in
*The following applies to missionary groups, individuals, volunteers, church groups, etc.
- Do Your Homework – Find a group of people somewhere on the planet, (could be anywhere), and fall in love with them. Invest your time in people, not a cause. Causes come and go, but the people will always be there. Once you’ve fallen in love with a group of people, you’ll know better what they need and how to serve them. In today’s modern world it is quite easy to contact someone via phone or email in the area that you want to serve. Do all the research you can to figure out what the people really need in this area. Learn about the politics and culture surround the people and the issues in which you intend to address. Until you’ve done your homework thoroughly, you do not have the right to say you are serving a cause, community, orphanage, individual, etc. Sometimes this process can take a year or more.
- Pick a Few Scouts – Don’t send 15 people over on the first visit. That’s just irresponsible and frivolous. Send over maybe two scouts. These people should be the best equipped and experienced in your group. They should have experience in similar environments and they should be good problem solvers, planners and negotiators. They must be sensitive to the culture and make sure they incorporate cultural issues into your plan. Their purpose is to meet with the people you wish to serve, (or to scout them out), identify cultural issues that will need to be factored in, create a local team, and devise a plan with that local team. You should plan on having your scouts stay for at least 1-3 months to really get a handle on the situation on the ground.
- Devise A Strategic Plan – Take that plan back home to your mission team. Then revise the plan and all of your ideals, put them together and come up with a solid plan in which you will execute with the whole missions team. Put together a solid plan for who’s going to go, for how long and when. Figure out your budget for the trip, making sure to have a buffer of funds. This is always needed when working abroad. Appoint team leaders and make sure everyone has a very specific purpose. No one should just be a “helper”. Everyone should have a specific purpose before they ever leave for the trip. PLAN this mission as if it were a military operation (even though it will inevitably evolve more than you could ever imagine once you hit foreign soil). Just be prepared. Have backup plans and be ready to change the methods in which you will reach your goal at any minute.
- The Scout
IMPORTANT NOTE: Do everything in your power to avoid reinventing the wheel. Work with local teams, work with existing NGOs (non-profits), form partnerships, facilitate projects that are already in place that need resources, etc. Don’t make this trip about you or your missions group. Your goal is not to come back with impressive numbers and accomplishments. Your goal is to serve, selflessly and diligently.
- Listen and Learn – I have mentioned this a few times already, and I’ll continue to as it is of utmost importance. When you are a foreigner, especially and American, you will have the tendency to be impatient, to turn into a dictator (usually out of frustration) and to do your own thing. Don’t. Listen to the people and to their culture. If you don’t, you risk creating a bigger mess than what you started with. Listen to your local team and trust their knowledge of the culture, government and people. Lean people’s names and stories. Learn about their lives. Take pictures, (only when you’ve gotten permission, and it’s important to ask first). Take videos and get interviews. Be polite and always ask people before gathering this info if it is ok to do so. Don’t be pushy. Remember that a big part of your mission is to LISTEN AND LEARN.
- Report Back to the Group – Go back to your church or group and report everything you saw with pictures, stories, video, songs, souvenirs, art, or anything else you want to relay the message. Get people excited about what you learned. Relay who the people are, not just what you did for them. Talk about individual people. Avoid using words like “they”, “them” and “those people” as much as possible. Use their names and stress that they are not just pictures and statistics. They are people, just like you and me. Their life and death matters just like ours. This leg of your mission is focused on relaying everything you took so much time to learn while you were away.
- Preparing for the Group
- Saddle Up and Roll Out – Now you have a good plan and a good team. It’s time to go on your mission. Everything should be in order. Once you hit the ground, be ready to for anything. Be flexible. LISTEN. Remember you are there to serve, not just to carry out your well devised plan. So things may change. You have to be ok with that, especially if you are operating in a developing country (like
IMPORTANT NOTE: Make sure you’ve written OFFICIAL LETTERS OF DONATION for all the items you might be bringing into the country that are being donated. For instance, if you are bringing a box of bibles or a box of parts for a well, you will need to write a letter saying that “X Group” from “X Country” is donating said goods to “Y Group” in “Y Country” for the purpose of “Z”. Make sure you calculate and include the value of your goods. These letters should be cleared in customs BEFOR your group ever leaves their home country. Work with your local team on this. If you do this, you will have no problems (or very few) at customs getting your stuff into the country. If you do not, you will risk not getting your things by the time you have to return to your country. (We’ve had this happen, and heard of multiple instances of this.)
- Keep Your Word – Now your whole team is back, having just had the experience of a lifetime. You’re all full of stories and everyone has a slide show or video they want to show. This is good. Refer back to Step #6. Now you’ve got to create a plan for keeping the lines of communication open with the community you just served. Make sure you’ve set up systems for how they are carrying out “the plan” you left them with. Keep them accountable. Encourage them to keep YOU accountable. Do whatever you have to do to keep this relationship going. Do not be one of those groups that go over, get their fill of humanitarian work or alleviate their guilt of selfish living and just moves on. Don’t be that group. That’s what gives missionaries a bad name, (or at least on of the many contributing factors). Make a plan for visiting annually (at least) and make sure activities are going on all year around. Set goals and do what it takes to achieve them. This section could go on and on. The point here is to make sure this isn’t a one time dip into another country and then you leave them hanging out to dry. Do what you said you’d do. I’d venture to say “hang them out to dry” isn’t on that list. Just be true to your word. Lead by example. Remember that you are not just representing your group, you are representing “missionaries” as a whole, (as well as your country and race).
- Keep The Fire Alive – Being that I work for a small grassroots organization, I have a very first hand knowledge of the fact that most of our problems in developing countries could be solved with a huge bag of money. We have lots of great plans, but we need the money to carry it out. So become a resource. Get your group or church or whatever all fired up about supporting your community over there. And make sure the funds you are sending are being accounted for accurately and that they are going towards sustainable projects. You should set up a system of checks and balances. Don’t just leave things up in the air. Run it like a good business. That’s what will truly serve the people. 1 This should not be the end of your missions trip; it should represent the beginning of a long relationship between two communities. You’ve started a new family and you must maintain those relationships. True missions work is an ongoing. Don’t concern yourself with having a huge list of all the great missions destinations and projects you’ve done at the end of the year. Concern yourself with the relationship you’ve created with a deserving community that needs a helping hand. Be committed to them, just like you said you would.
When you are in another country, especially
You can apply this lesson to all sorts of other situations. Listen to your local team. Don’t be careless with your time or money or commitments, always. The second you make a promise and don’t follow through, you will begin fueling stereotypes that missionaries come here and do more damage than good. You are better than that. Just be wise and calculated in all that you do and don’t make promises that you aren’t 100% sure you can keep. At Sisters of Rwanda, we may spend 6 months to a year putting a project together for the Sisters before we ever tell them about it. And we don’t announce it until it’s already happening. That way we rule out a lot of opportunities for disappointment and hurt. This takes discipline, but it’s imperative to the success of your mission, which is to serve.
This is just my opinion based on my experiences. I’ve never done any traditional missions work or been on a missions trip. I came to
If you’re here to pick apart my philosophies and ideas and find holes in them, you’d better have some free time on your hands. If you are open to hearing some good ways to serve others and then apply those to what you are already doing, then you didn’t just waste your time. I hope this is helpful in some way. And if it serves just one person, it was worth the 20 minutes it took me to think about it and write it down.
*If by chance you have found this document to be helpful and accurate (at least on most counts), please feel free to pass it along. This wasn’t done for any official purpose; only in hopes of serving the missionary and humanitarian community.
If you'd like a PDF of this document, you can download it HERE.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
So How Do I Serve?
*Make sure to notice the footnotes on this one.
The purpose of most of my writing is to hopefully incite a healthy perspective shift in those that have never known or have lost sight of our calling (all of us) to serve humanity. Americans largely live in an extremely uncultured bubble of comfortable, self indulgent mediocrity. I don’t say that to be judgmental or abrasive; only to illustrate a painful truth that is exemplified in most of American suburbia. People get so wrapped up in “stuff” and everyday petty drama that they forget there is a whole world of poverty stricken outcasts out there that need their help. And regardless of what religion you subscribe to, if you do in fact believe in a God, most every religion speaks of their God being with and favoring the poor, oppressed and abused. And as a Christian, I certainly know that’s where my God likes to spend His time (and probably His money too).
So let’s just assume that you’ve read some of my previous postings and maybe even a few great books like “Irresistible Revolution” and you now feel compelled to serve, but you have no idea how to do so effectively. Well you are certainly not alone. There are millions of people out there that feel convicted and consequently called to serve but they just feel trapped in their own lives. They think “I am just a house mom or dad, so how do I help some poor kid in
I want to start this by reiterating the fact that some people are called to serve those in other countries, and some are called to be teachers, pastors, life coaches, mechanics, parents, presidents, architects, and policemen in their own country, community or household. I don’t ever want to imply that you have to serve in
I’ve spent many years working on all different sides of humanitarianism and philanthropy, and I’d be lying if I told you that we really need anything more than a big bank account with unlimited funds. (footnote 1) Rather than try and generalize here, I’m just going to use our NGO as an example in order to illustrate what I’m trying to say. We’ve been here for two years, listening and learning. We know who we are serving and what they need because we’ve been here listening to them, not imposing our American ideals into their culture. We have a strategic plan and a great crew. We are ready to make it happen. But what is our biggest road block? Funding, or rather the lack thereof. But it’s difficult to get funding on the front end of a project like this. No one believes you can do it. And we have no real track record, yet. So there are three primary ways to go about this, 1) fund raising, 2) advocacy – meaning educating and sensitizing, 3) creating our own income generation projects that help fund the organization as well as provide income to the women we serve. (Number 3 is the primary focus at KEZA.) But you really only have the ability to help with two of those. So let’s break it down practically.
1) Fund Raising – This can be done many, many different ways. You can write a check out of your own pocket, you can encourage others to do the same, and you can help to create actual fund raising events where lots of people come together to give. However, we have found that the single most effective form of fund raising is the “home fundraiser”. This is where you do your homework about whatever group of people you’d like to serve, you put together a little event at your home, you invite 10-20 of your closest friends, you serve some coffee and deserts, you give a presentation, you have a discussion and you ask for funds. Then you create an ongoing community of supporters that gather once a month or so to learn about what is going on with their project and they give money to it, constantly keeping track of where the money is going. This process is extremely effective. Instead of giving $100, do a home fund raiser that costs you $100 to host, get 10 others to give $100, and turn your $100 into $1,000. And you also get to create a cool community for like minded friends. And there's ubuntu again...
2) Advocacy – Ok this one is just a trick. Any time an organization says they need advocacy, what they are really saying is that they need you to tell everyone about their organization so they will give money to it (or act in some way). What else do you really need advocacy for? We are not out to teach people about catastrophic events for our health, or theirs. It’s in hopes that they will do something to stop it from continuing, and as most of them are not going to actually fly across the world to stop it. It’s most likely that they will just write a check. So that’s really what advocacy is about, (outside of the need for lobbying, which is definitely a relevant and important task).
So if you are wondering how you can help to end extreme poverty, fight HIV/AIDS, get orphans into homes, provide schooling for poor kids, or whatever it is you feel called to do, there are some easy and practical ways to doing so. Just remember that if you do anything, let it be the start, not an ending. Don’t give once and mark it off your list. Give consistently. Take $100 and turn it into $1,000 for your favorite charity. Host “home fund raisers”. Don’t do it once. Do it 12 times a year if you can. Be consistent. Teach your children the importance of giving, serving the poor, and building community. Encourage your church to give more of its income to missions and less to building the new coffee shop in the lobby. (footnote 2) Give 10% (or more) of your income to the poor. Not your church, the poor. Get creative. Don’t let your 10% tithe to the church be a cop-out. If you feel compelled or called to give money to the church, do it, but I encourage you to take the time to see how you might invest in the poor with 10% (maybe in addition to your tithe) of your income. Tell everyone you know about the community you’ve adopted. Be their spokesperson. Plaster your house with materials about them so everyone knows what you are about. Don’t be a weekend warrior. In the spirit of the Quakers (known for their simplicity and excellent oatmeal), “let your life speak”.
There are tons of great things you can do. I can’t give you a master list. I’m not the guru on effective giving. However, I will tell you to get creative. Don’t make giving and serving something you do on Sundays or once a month with a check. Make it your focus. For those of you that ask yourself “What would Jesus do?”, rather ask yourself “what DID Jesus do?” He lived with the poor. He made it His life, to the death. That’s who He was, not what He did.
So who are you? What are you about? The single biggest thing you can do to serve the poor, anywhere in the world, is to first convince yourself that it shouldn’t just be an item on your To-Do List for the day; it should be your life, in all that you do. It should be who you are, not what you do. You shouldn’t have to explain it to your friends; your life should be speaking it for you. Once you commit yourself to a group of people you are going to serve, you’ll figure out how to do it. Just like when you really want that hazelnut latte from the coffee store that is WAY out of the way from where you are going today. I bet you’ll figure out how to make it work. We all do exactly what we want to do. So what’s on your list today?
1 I want to make sure I say this. I believe that ANY new organization doing humanitarian work needs to be just barely above the flat broke line for their first year or two. It makes you streamlined. It makes you strategic. It makes you calculated. It weeds out the ones in your organization that may be in it for the wrong reasons. It refines you. If you are just starting out and you get a million dollars to work with, invest $900,000 and use the remaining $100,000 to do your first year of work. Trust me on this. This will have a major effect on your level of effectiveness and the sustainability of your project. It’s important to be a little poor when you are helping the extremely poor. Do this for a year and you’ll agree with what I’m saying. (And yes, we stumbled upon this little factoid, it wasn’t something we set out to do.)
2 Yeah I know it attracts the kiddos, but let’s keep some perspective on what would really impact their lives and challenge them to be better servants. Instead use that coffee shop budget to do weekly trips to visit and serve the poor in your community. Kids dig that too. Or save up for a great missions trip. Create an income generating activity for the poor. Coffee shops are easy. Get creative.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
She Even Has A Name
I’ve been doing humanitarian work for as long as I can remember. I recall quite vividly seeing the music video for “We are the World” back in 1985. I was only 7 years old. I’ve always been a music enthusiast, even at that age, and I was irrevocably moved by what I saw in that video. Here were all of the people I admired, Michael Jackson, Stevie Wonder, Bob Dylan, Bob Geldof, etc, fighting for people on the other side of the world. It was my first exposure to “Africans”. These little Ethiopian children (this was during the famine in
Why is it always “us” and “them”? Most people would say they believe in justice and equality, but few actually practice it, or even realize it’s something they have anything to do with. What would you do if your daughter, niece, or cousin was being sexually abused and you found out about it? I would imagine you’d do just about anything, even things you never dreamed you were capable of, just to stop this atrocity from happening. What if it was a little girl in your church or school? She was having her innocence stripped from her and nothing was being done about it. There would be an outrage, right? What if it was a little girl that lived in the ghetto near your city? And what if it was a little African girl? Really think about it. Where is your mind going? Do you feel yourself detaching? Can you start to feel your mind removing yourself from the responsibility of helping this innocent child? Now ask yourself how far removed from you she has to be for you to not care anymore? My guess is that once she’s removed from your immediate sphere of influence, she’s not your problem anymore. She becomes a “them”.
The problem is that people, Americans in particular, don’t even want to know the truth of what surrounds them. The term “ignorance is bliss” is no joke. We’ve become quite skilled at removing ourselves from the responsibility of loving our neighbors as ourselves. We become consumed by our everyday “needs”, which in most cases are not needs at all; they are simply worldly desires. If I had a picture of a little blond haired, blue eyed girl from your church and said she was being beaten, you would be angered. You’d want to stop it. You’d even feel responsible for stopping it simply because you now have knowledge of it. But if I hold up a picture of a little 7 year old girl from Rwanda that has been sold into prostitution in order to provide food for her AIDS infected mother and three sickly siblings, you’d likely cringe a little and say something like, “that’s just horrible and I can’t believe that is happening”. And you’d be correct because you really CAN’T believe its happening. It’s not even reality for you. If we really believed African’s are equal to Americans, the every day atrocities of
But we are all human. That includes all the people that the
If you consider yourself to be a caring, compassionate person that is searching for a way to help others; I would encourage you first to address the issue of “us and them”. People are always trying to figure out what “issue” they are going to get involved with or fight for. Don’t choose an issue. Choose people. What people are you going to fall in love with? What people will you choose to believe are just the same as you? They could be right down the street or in the shanty towns of
When we talk about HIV, poverty, corruption and all of the other “African” issues, people very quickly think, “those are huge problems”, “we will never actually fix those issues”, “there is nothing I can do to stop HIV”, or any other number of hopeless proclamations. You can find a ton of great reasons to remove yourself from any responsibility in the situation. Or you may think that Bono and Bill Gates are already on it, so no worries; everything’s going to be ok. And that’s just the kind of thinking that are making all of those doubts become a reality. Imagine if all of us believed that we could make a difference, and that we could do it by simply realizing that it’s not us and them. We are together. The next time you see a picture of a starving little African child, or a bum on the street, spend some time imagining that person as your own daughter, sister, or friend. And know that they are. Believe it. We must first change the way our minds think before we can expect to change the world. But it’s happening every day. You just have to decide if you’re going to be part of the problem or part of the solution. There is no in-between. There is no in-between.
The poor, no matter what natinality, are not inanimate objects. Remember, she’s your daughter, your niece, your neighbor. She’s not an “African”. She’s not a statistic. She’s not a picture on the Compassion International commercial. She’s a little innocent girl. She even has a name.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Serve to Lead
I love movies. I can reach back in my Rolodex of watched movies and pull out a quote or an example for just about any situation at any given moment. Suffice it to say, I’ve seen a lot of them. Movies can be powerful. There’s the scenery, the captivating music that lures you into one emotion and on to the next, the interaction with people; everything you need to make a powerful point or tell a beautiful story. Movies have greatly impacted my life over the years and I believe God speaks to me through them. Hey, if he can speak through a donkey to Balaam in the bible, he can speak through a good flick.
So I watched “The Last Samurai” again last night. It was probably the 4th time I’d seen it, but for some reason it really impacted me on another level this time. Whether or not you like Tom Cruise or not is irrelevant. The movie is a masterpiece on many levels. I could go on an on, but I’ll get to the point. There is much talk of the “way of the Samurai”, or “Bushido” which is a philosophy that describes the way a Samurai is commanded to live. It’s not a suggestion; it’s a way of life. You are either a Samurai or you are not. It’s not a race or religion. It’s a belief system that is apparent in every action of those that follow the philosophy; the Samurai. For instance, the Samurai do not believe in promises. They believe that if you have said something, promise or not, you are then bound by what you said. There are 7 virtues represented in Bushido. They are:
Gi – Justice and Morality
Makoto – Complete Sincerity
Rei – Polite Courtesy
Jin – Compassion
Yu – Heroic Courage
Meiyo – Honor
If you’d like to learn more about Bushido, I’d suggest checking out Wikipedia.
Could you imagine if everyone lived by this philosophy? I think about this in comparison to
When I think of William Wallace, Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Bono, or Jesus (I think they all would have enjoyed each other’s company), I see servants; people that would give their life (or did) for what they believe in, for others. William Wallace gave his life for his people, as did many other great leaders. Bono spends the majority of his life serving the poor. Jesus gave his life on the cross between two thieves, after spending his life living with the poor. These guys are all servants. They weren’t people that just went around leaving a trail of dead bodies and wounded souls in their wake. They fought (in different ways) for their people and to protect what they believed to be sacred. There is honor in that.
I believe the best leaders are so because they are the best servants. Their first thoughts are how to serve others, not how to get more for themselves. They would give up everything just to feed another hungry person. That’s leadership. What will people remember about you when you are dead and gone? Will they remember someone that served others or themselves? Will they remember a leader, a follower or a dictator? If there’s one thing I pray I can teach others, it’s to be a servant. I would consider my life to be a success if there was nothing listed on my tombstone other than “Jared N Miller, Servant”.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I Get To Live This Life
It’s been a while since I last posted an entry. I’ve been back in Rwanda now for 3 months and it’s been a bit of a blur. It’s truly amazing how much I learn in just one day. I’m constantly soaking up knowledge, learning from trial and error, listening to the culture, learning from the wisdom of my colleagues and the women we serve, and having revelations and epiphanies almost daily. I’m reading a lot, which certainly adds to this experience. I love to learn and I’m doing a lot of it lately.
I just finished “Sex God” by Rob Bell. It’s amazing, to say the least, and it epitomizes the Ubuntu theory I’m speaking of in this blog. Yeah, it’s got a funny name, but I assure you there is very little about sex (in the physical sense) and very much about how we are to treat humanity, especially in regards to intimate relationships. It rocked my world and I bet it’ll rock yours.
I also just finished Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. He has such a way of saying things so profoundly. I am continually amazed by his wisdom and understanding of the “church” and what it is really supposed to be. And to take it up a notch, I am about ¾ of the way through Shane Claiborne’s “Irresistible Revolution”. That book is truly revolutionary. It’s not the bible, and it’s not the only truth, but it is no joke either. Shane is a master at breaking down the teachings of Jesus and how He really lived, and intended us to live. Suffice it to say, I am moved. Consequently, I’ve given away everything I can’t fit into about two backpacks, (not that I had a lot to start out with). I could go on and on about it, but I’d suggest just getting the book. It’s a quick and compelling read.
Things are intense here with Sisters of Rwanda, as always. We have to show a lot of “tough love” these days. We are not here to give handouts or to perpetuate poverty (which I consider to be one in the same). We are a training facility. And we are here to “teach them to fish”, so that they may “eat for a lifetime”. And it’s tough; maybe more on us than them. We just want to love them. But true love isn’t all roses. I know that if we truly love these women, it means we have to love them enough to teach them, not just to enable them.
As usual, we are out of money and struggling to secure the capital to even carry on with our income generation activities, but we are making it, somehow. And we have “crazy stuff” come at us daily. Emotions are high. We have a new country director (Ilea Dorsey) that is fresh out of two years working in Uganda and now having to adapt to a whole new culture here in Rwanda. But she is a trooper, and she’s part of what makes all of this work. She’s already part of the family, and we are fortunate to have her, as a leader, and as part of the family. You can check out her blog (she is an AMAZING writer) at www.kidogokidogo.blogspot.com .
We have presented the initial concept of Ubuntu Revolution to quite a few Rwandese since I’ve been back. To be honest, I anticipated quite a bit of resistance. But we got none. Everyone is ready for it. They want a revolution; one that brings them together and creates peace. So we are elated. Yes, elated. This is everything I’ve been working towards my whole life. Now it’s culminating in this revolution. It’s sort of my “labor of love”, but what is so amazing is that I’m not alone in it. Everyone is so supportive, and that’s what will make it work. This is about all of us.
I was riding on the back of a moto taxi the other day on my way to the office. I had my backpack on containing my “mobile office”, the sun was shining, just after a light rain, people were walking in the streets and I had just finished a stellar hour of kickboxing with two little street kids that I teach at my house every morning. I thought to myself, “you know, I don’t think I’d change anything in my life right now”. I couldn’t stop smiling. I’m here. I’m living my lifelong dream of justice for vulnerable women in Africa; starting a revolution of peace and equality. This is my destiny, my calling, my purpose, or whatever you want to label it. It’s what I was put on this earth to do and there’s nothing that could make me happier than knowing that I’m fulfilling that. I can’t believe I get to live this life.
I just finished “Sex God” by Rob Bell. It’s amazing, to say the least, and it epitomizes the Ubuntu theory I’m speaking of in this blog. Yeah, it’s got a funny name, but I assure you there is very little about sex (in the physical sense) and very much about how we are to treat humanity, especially in regards to intimate relationships. It rocked my world and I bet it’ll rock yours.
I also just finished Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. He has such a way of saying things so profoundly. I am continually amazed by his wisdom and understanding of the “church” and what it is really supposed to be. And to take it up a notch, I am about ¾ of the way through Shane Claiborne’s “Irresistible Revolution”. That book is truly revolutionary. It’s not the bible, and it’s not the only truth, but it is no joke either. Shane is a master at breaking down the teachings of Jesus and how He really lived, and intended us to live. Suffice it to say, I am moved. Consequently, I’ve given away everything I can’t fit into about two backpacks, (not that I had a lot to start out with). I could go on and on about it, but I’d suggest just getting the book. It’s a quick and compelling read.
Things are intense here with Sisters of Rwanda, as always. We have to show a lot of “tough love” these days. We are not here to give handouts or to perpetuate poverty (which I consider to be one in the same). We are a training facility. And we are here to “teach them to fish”, so that they may “eat for a lifetime”. And it’s tough; maybe more on us than them. We just want to love them. But true love isn’t all roses. I know that if we truly love these women, it means we have to love them enough to teach them, not just to enable them.
As usual, we are out of money and struggling to secure the capital to even carry on with our income generation activities, but we are making it, somehow. And we have “crazy stuff” come at us daily. Emotions are high. We have a new country director (Ilea Dorsey) that is fresh out of two years working in Uganda and now having to adapt to a whole new culture here in Rwanda. But she is a trooper, and she’s part of what makes all of this work. She’s already part of the family, and we are fortunate to have her, as a leader, and as part of the family. You can check out her blog (she is an AMAZING writer) at www.kidogokidogo.blogspot.com .
We have presented the initial concept of Ubuntu Revolution to quite a few Rwandese since I’ve been back. To be honest, I anticipated quite a bit of resistance. But we got none. Everyone is ready for it. They want a revolution; one that brings them together and creates peace. So we are elated. Yes, elated. This is everything I’ve been working towards my whole life. Now it’s culminating in this revolution. It’s sort of my “labor of love”, but what is so amazing is that I’m not alone in it. Everyone is so supportive, and that’s what will make it work. This is about all of us.
I was riding on the back of a moto taxi the other day on my way to the office. I had my backpack on containing my “mobile office”, the sun was shining, just after a light rain, people were walking in the streets and I had just finished a stellar hour of kickboxing with two little street kids that I teach at my house every morning. I thought to myself, “you know, I don’t think I’d change anything in my life right now”. I couldn’t stop smiling. I’m here. I’m living my lifelong dream of justice for vulnerable women in Africa; starting a revolution of peace and equality. This is my destiny, my calling, my purpose, or whatever you want to label it. It’s what I was put on this earth to do and there’s nothing that could make me happier than knowing that I’m fulfilling that. I can’t believe I get to live this life.
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